Yesterday, during a VIP day with a client I shared with her my observation about letting go of the things that bog us down-our baggage. You know, baggage: That heavy stuff we carry around with us that we try to ignore, and often don’t even realize is there, because it’s buried so deeply in our subconscious.
It’s the limiting beliefs and the emotional buttons that get pushed when we least expect it. It’s the concealed commitments we have around playing small, or trying to fix others, or control the world around us. It’s also the little voices that tell us we’re not good enough, or don’t deserve what we want, or keep us in line so we don’t shine our light too brightly and get noticed.
The baggage is buried in our mind and in our body, yet it’s there for others to see. We are often the last ones to see it or even know it’s there. It’s in the way we think, the way we speak–even in our posture, it’s in the way we move through space, or the tics we do habitually.
Our baggage is there energetically and we bring it with us wherever we go. Most of the time, it’s hidden. It stays ‘behind’ us and only comes between us and others and our goals, dreams, and intentions when something pushes the emotional buttons that keep the baggage in place.
My client and I were discussing how people want to be free of these limiting beliefs, and how many of us just want a magic bullet that will rid us of these “mind-body afflictions”, but there is a crucial step that many folks miss, and I missed it for years.
Ownership.
Funny thing about ownership is this: Some people go around “owning” their disfunction, they wear the label like a badge of honor. “I’m this, I’m that.” Or “I have this, I have that.” They say things like:
“You don’t understand, it’s because I’m _______”
Or “I can’t ________ because I have __________.”
(Fill in the blank with whatever you want there. Some of my favorites that I’ve used myself are ADD, Perimenopausal, Adrenal Fatigued, Stressed, a working mom who needs to hold it all together…).
I’m not talking about “owning” our stuff in this way. That’s not ownership, that’s alignment with the problem and allowing the problem to be a forgone conclusion about what’s possible for us.
I’m also not saying the problem isn’t real, or that we aren’t experiencing very real symptoms. But if we own the symptoms and become so focused on those, then they have a tendency to grow and become even more firmly entrenched.
I’m talking about seeing the problem, the baggage, for what it is. I’m talking about owning that stuff in order to release it. As I shared with my client, while pointing to a bag on the counter between us: Most of us say “I’d really like for that to go away!” “I wish someone would come and take away that garbage!” And maybe you move it out of your way for a few days or hours, maybe even years, but it never really goes away. We just keep looking to others to make it go away. (Doctors, counselors, friends, partners, family, etc.).
Nobody can take out our garbage for us.
In order to really let go of something, we have got to be willing to look at it, pick it up and say “this is mine, and I no longer want it”, and dispose of it (or release it) ourselves. It doesn’t matter how it got there. It doesn’t matter if we learned it from our parents, siblings, teachers, friends, or the school bullies.
It’s not our fault that it’s there.
Get that. It’s not our fault that this baggage is there–but it is our responsibility to do something with it. If you want to be free, you gotta own it, claim it and let it go yourself.
This is the work that I do with people. It’s what has changed my life and the lives of my clients. When you can claim your baggage, the crap that you’ve been trying to hide (and not very well might I add!) and let it go–guess what you also get in addition to feeling lighter?
You get to own your greatness too.
For most of us, this is far scarier than letting go of the pain, because we’ve believed for so long that we aren’t worthy or good enough. I can assure you, that you are worthy, and you are plenty good enough. You will be able to access that awareness when you stop carrying around, and owning, that you are anything other than worthy and good enough.
It’s not about adding anything to you to make you “better.” It’s about releasing whatever doesn’t let you see your best in the first place.
Like a diamond in a coal mine, or the Golden Buddha hidden in a clay shell, remove the darkness, dirt and heaviness (the baggage), and the treasure is within.
What baggage are you willing to claim today, so you can release it–once and for all?
My specialty is seeing the baggage and helping people release it. If you’re feeling heavy and not sure where to begin, or just what to release and how, call me at 206-4VOICE8 (206-486-4238).
I can help you take your garbage out.
From My Heart To Yours,
Kris
Great post, Kris! A little light bulb went on for me as I was reading and realized how easy it is to think of “self-judgment” as “ownership,” when really they could not be more opposite. That’s been my biggest challenge – seeing a pattern in myself that I wish wasn’t there and feeling bad about it in some way (guilty, fearful, like a failure, etc.), instead of just recognizing it for what it is – another layer to be looked at, acknowledged, appreciated, accepted, released.
Thanks for the insight and for the work you’re doing in the world!
Liz