Every business has them, silent killers that destroy our intentions, goals and dreams of success. What are these killers and where do they come from? More importantly, how do we transform them into productive upstanding citizens?
Have you guessed it yet? I won’t drag it out, if you’re like me you want the answers and you want them fast. Beliefs. Those little buggers are your beliefs. More specifically, limiting beliefs—those thoughts you think over and over and over again that tell you the world isn’t safe, or you’re going to fail. In fact, they have become like second nature to you and you don’t even consciously know they’re there, until you run headfirst into another brick wall in your business, and then you’re painfully aware that you’re stuck…again.
Much like wind, we can’t see beliefs, but we can see their results. You may be asking yourself “What is a negative or limiting belief and how do I know if I have some running the show?” Let’s take a look.
A belief is nothing more than a thought you think over and over again, it is also a thought that has an emotional charge to it. Beliefs can be positive and empowering—or they can tear us down and literally destroy relationships, businesses and lives.
Some common negative beliefs entrepreneurs think (whether they are aware of it or not!)
~It’s a struggle to make money.
~I can’t charge what I’m worth because if I do, no one will pay me.
~Marketing and sales is sleazy and I hate having to do it.
~I shouldn’t have to market myself, my work speaks for itself.
~I’m great up until I have to ask for the money—then I end up taking less than I intended and need, because I don’t want to “bother” people or offend them.
~It’s the economy.
~It’s the government.
~I hate sales!
~Everyone is hurting in these times.
~I’m afraid I’ll lose everything OR I have lost everything!
Beliefs such as these affect our emotions (how we feel about ourselves, our business, others, etc); our energy (do we get “grabby” with customers and clients—trying to “make” them want what we have); our actions (avoidance, procrastination); and of course, our results (sales/no sales).
You will undoubtedly read many of those beliefs listed above and logically think: “I know that’s not really true” or “I don’t believe that!” But some part of you does believe it—and even though you may not consciously believe the statement, you may be subconsciously operating from the belief, and that’s why you keep running into the same people, scenarios or stuck places in your relationships and business.
We are so much more than what we are aware of. Our conscious mind processes only about 7 (plus or minus 2) bits of information a second. Our subconscious on the other hand, processes around 40 million bits of information a second.
Think of your mind like an ice burg. The part of the ice burg we see floating on top of the water is your conscious mind; you use this for logic, will, and observing data from the 5 senses. About 10% of your thought process takes place here. The other 90% of the ice hovers under the surface of the water—it’s your subconscious mind and it governs our beliefs, emotions, memories, fears, habits, body systems (like breathing, heartbeat), imagination, creativity and our sense of “who we are.” The majority of our processing occurs here.
You may think you are running your life or your business, but it is your subconscious mind that is truly running the show. The inability to manifest what you want to achieve in your daily life due to the negative emotions, programs, and limiting beliefs held in your subconscious mind are what are contributing to your fears and stress, if not causing you stress in the first place.
I call these negative beliefs “silent killers” because 98% of the time—you don’t even know they are there, all you know is that you are stuck or blocked in some way. In a session with a client recently we discovered a huge fear and belief that had blocked her from even seeing her true genius and calling. She wasn’t even able to access the years of experience she had in business, and have it be the foundation of her offerings. Interestingly, it was also something she is passionate about and loves doing, but she had shut it down years ago and it was a closed off room. Literally she was leaving money and abundance in that room. Then we opened the door again and whoosh! It was like her whole business lit up—and so did she!
To be clear, while the thoughts and beliefs themselves can and do cause stress, it’s the emotional charge behind them that really locks these thoughts into place and gives them their power.
How do you know if limiting beliefs are silently killing your business and your relationships? Here are some clues:
- Do you find yourself doing the same thing over and over again—sometimes with the same people, other times it’s different people but similar feelings and scenarios?
- Do you avoid taking action when you know you either need to, WANT to, or are “supposed” to (procrastination)?
- Do you sabotage yourself every time you take action in the direction of your goals? Perhaps you feel that others sabotage you?
- Do things just “come up” and you have no control over them, and that’s why you do the things you do (or don’t do).
- Do you feel depressed, anxious, or like you are about to self-combust?
- Do you feel envious or jealous of others who are doing what you want to do? Maybe you think you can’t do it as well as them, so you just give up without even trying…
I teach my clients how to detect and shift the hidden beliefs—the ones they logically say, “Oh, that’s not my problem—I don’t believe that!” But when we look deeper and ask their subconscious mind we find that really deep down inside they do in fact believe it. It’s the mixed messages, the disharmony between their conscious and subconscious mind that is giving them trouble, not anyone or anything in the outside world!
It Starts With Awareness
As with most things in life, awareness is the first step in addressing and shifting limiting beliefs. I haven’t met anyone yet who didn’t, or doesn’t, have a few beliefs running the show that they didn’t even know they had. In fact, I find some of my own all the time! I used to get down on myself about it and feel ashamed of having these limiting beliefs. I thought it meant something was wrong with me (which is just a belief, by the way). Turns out, I’m a spiritual being having a human experience—just like you. So, now I look at these negative beliefs and ask:
“Is it serving me or others for me to keep thinking this way?”
And…
“What would or could be a more empowering belief to hold instead?”
If you were to transform even one of your top most powerful limiting beliefs, you would begin to see tangible shifts and positive results in your business. But there is something more than just changing the beliefs, and unlocking the emotions behind them. You must take action based on the new empowering beliefs—and that is where having a coach or a guide can be essential to really locking in the new state you desire.
Don’t let the silent killers of business, relationships, and life take you down. It’s an inside job, and it takes just a little bit of courage, intention and cojones to look those killers in the eye and say: “I see you, and I’m done with you. I choose to believe _______!”